Testing testing 1,2,3

Okay, it's 9.11 a.m. on February 10th to Monday. I'm on 5.80 heading south just passing Marina Bay, Marquay and the big State Department of Health lab. I love the smoke stacks. Last night was the Oscars. I'm going to eat a bar back. I came over with Suraya in Amir. Who won the Oscars? I think best actor was Joaquin Phoenix who accepted his award by shaming us all who eat meat or are not, you know, or who use animals in the processing of our food, the production of our food. I didn't really like that. And then what's her name? One best actress, a camper we met. I forgot her name. She was in Bridget Jones's diary, but anyway, just from Texas. She won her role in movie Judy. We couldn't hear what she had to say because we were too busy talking about her plastic surgery. Third, I guess director and best movie was Parasite. The Korean film by Manum. Of course, I'm going to blank on his name. I got to practice his name better. We immediately watched Parasite that night. It's definitely a creative film. I say a lot of Twilight Zone influence there. Basically, one of those films that's like a moral tale for all parties involved. Not just one. The aggressor. Who's the aggressor? Who's not the aggressor? But that's always changing. And a Parasite technically needs to survive. So it has nothing to do with being the aggressor at all. But rather a survival. So it's kind of interesting. And we learn to live with Parasites every day, and be knowns to us. And so is it appropriate to even call it a Parasite? I think it's kind of interesting. But yeah. So that's what happened. Now I'm going to start my regular dictation.

Okay it's 9.14 am at February 10th. One day I'm in bumper to bumper traffic on 5.80 I'm about to get off if you can and What have I talked about? Well I've been in a weird mood ever since I finished the table yesterday that's another thing I forgot to talk about. I didn't really finish the table I just finished the main portion of the panel without the breadboards and so feeling pumped about that but Yeah so I don't know if I've been preoccupied with the table so I haven't really had a chance to think about flight of forest but I want to get back to it and I think the most important thing that I thought about over the weekend was when I was simply telling Heidi what it was like for me you know how I ended up getting a Middle East Studies degree. I got a Middle East Studies degree simply because I was trying to complete a Bachelor of Arts. I had tried engineering I tried kinesiology I tried business and I was disenchanted with kinesiology I think yeah I tried engineering electrical then mechanical then business then kinesiology but I remember I think I I think I was disenchanted with kinesiology because it wasn't it wasn't for me I didn't know what was for me I wanted an answered questions to be answered about who I was and they were key to determining who I will be I couldn't let them go I knew I wanted to take more more courses on the Middle East so I discovered that you know all the courses that I wanted to take would lead me to a degree in Middle East Studies so I did and I ended up taking I think another year and a half and so I graduated in 95 summer of 95 and it was a and prior to my graduation that the fall before that fall of 94 is when I met Heidi and I believe I had just finished Arabic I don't know remember if I finished a finished second year Arabic that doesn't seem right now it's taking third year Arabic it's possible so yeah but I had taken two years of Arabic and that summer went and stayed in Egypt and when I came back from that summer I I met Heidi for the first time and so my my time in Egypt made me realize I think who I really needed I was thinking more about who I needed than who I wanted because I didn't trust who I wanted I didn't trust my emotions to want or that that instead of my you know what my I guess my my mental efforts to basically tell myself this is what you need and so I literally came up with a list of characteristics for someone who I thought I would I could I could call a soulmate you know I was characteristics of a there were more external characteristics than they were internal I I really didn't say I want a sensitive person or I want you know I said I want someone who's academic I want someone who's athletic I want someone who speaks Arabic as a native language and I said I want someone who's Muslim I think I said all those things and I just I said whoever that person is is if they fit those categories I will help I'll pretty much fall in love with them and and the athletic was the part that I thought would never happen you know and I was I was probably a bit showveness of me to think that a a native speaker a Muslim native speaker of Arabic couldn't could not be an athlete and you know Heidi was obviously proof of that but also proof that there were plenty of them of which she knew but of in which I was not a member you know in a community in which I was not a member so I did not know and so my trip to Egypt that summer gave me a little peek into you know the country club culture of Cairo and who was in it and simply because I was more American than I was Egyptian I was allowed in it because you know they would be more accepting of who I was but you know I wasn't a member so I didn't matter you know how much I wanted to be in the country club so you know I think what most impressed me was that she was an Olympic diver not just any kind of athlete she was an Olympic athlete something that even I had wished I could be as a when I participated in track and field so yeah I think she hit she you know all my buttons were pushed you know that just created this incessant and insane graduation that I could not think of anything else and I daydreamed all day and all night about my life with her and what it would be like and what type of wife would she be and a mother and and she was not only academic but she wanted to be she was in half a dual major or majored in anthropology with a minor in archaeology one of those two things and she wanted to study in Tunisia that was like oh my god not only you know that she got this really cool way of looking at the world that's what she wants to study it's not like she wanted to be pre-med or engineering or law the profession that I feel like are way to like I mean don't get PhD in archaeology is also another type of ideology if you consider every degree an ideology it's another type of ideology but it was one that I think I was deeply curious about and so I can definitely say that all you know the supporting her through her PhD was as as as fatigue does I may have gotten because I wasn't doing the work but having to support it I was fascinated with every step of her work but to make a long story short how often do we in our lives literally envision our lives the the course that our lives will take and I don't know if we do that very often and this was an example of it and I want to incorporate it into fight of course because it is a bit of you know an encircling sort of novel so yeah I arrived at Safeway now I need to get stuff for my lunch so pausing for now